You are welcome!
Just so you know, your reaction is totally normal. People find it overwhelming, emotional, even somewhat upsetting because they are reviewing things they had hoped they left in the past.
But ultimatly, they find it a relief because now they have a more complete understanding and a sense of direction and purpose. So you're right on track!!
Let's paint together (what a lovely metaphor of yours), you don't have to go it alone!
Power on, an amazing man awaits you!