Well, I emailed Barry and asked him to clarify his comment about not wanting to live with a woman again, noting that I really was looking to get married again when the right man comes along.
He wrote back a lovely email saying that we did have different goals and wished me luck.
So, at least I now know about THIS one.
I doubt the outcome would have been any different if I had handled it differently.
I know that in the past it has often taken me 3-6 months to find out that the guy does not want the same things from relationship that I want!!
So I would say that figuring it out in only two dates is a pretty nice improvement.